Networking for Introverts (ESPECIALLY D.I.Y. Rock Stars)! đŹ
This post loosely aligns with the ideas in Gab & Jam episodes 192 and 193. If you want to hear the discussion, click those links (when they become live; on 9/27 --https://bit.ly/192networkintrovid and 10/3, respectively). (Subscribe so you won't miss it!)
Here's why...... Networking for introverts (ESPECIALLY D.I.Y. Rock Stars)
As you might imagine, many of us artists consider ourselves introverts. We like to be alone to contemplate our thoughts and prefer to dance to our own rhythm, which often times means shying away from crowds at parties and any other largeâor small âevents. On top of being introverts, we are also often rebels, who donât want anybody telling us who we need to be or what we should do. A third layer that might make us averse to networking is that, if you are like me, youâre what we call âreactionary,â and IMMEDIATELY run in the opposite direction of what masses of people are drawn to. These are some of the MAIN reasons that I have shunned the idea of networking for decades; preferring instead to work aloneâor ONLY with my partnerâESPECIALLY as I work on our vision. What I have only recently come to understand is that the dreaded ânâ wordânetworkingâis a natural outgrowth of expanding our world. And in recent year, where I have started to ONLY work smart and NOT hard, I want to maximize my time and effort in any way possible.
What I mean is that instead of thinking of it as âkowtowingâ or sucking up to folks for some unknown advantage that, itâs natural to even be DRAWN to want to talk to folks who you seem to have figured out the next fucking step in this puzzle of getting your venture off the ground. And I have learned that simply having a short chat with folksâvirtually or IRLâhas helped answer so many fucking questions that previously it would have taken me so long to solve.
And that beyond answering questions, these are the folks that you turn to to share wins with, who can ACTUALLY understand and appreciate what the heâll youâre talking about! And, as a bonus, these are the folks who have turned to us, sometimes, for the same thing. âPreviously, we had never thought that WE could be of help to others, because we hadnât attained the kind of credentials that others have, but, again, because we are on similar paths, it is natural that we might have done something that they are struggling with and they feel comfortable asking how we did it.
And now, I am NATURALLY nosyâasking about other folksâ processes ALL the timeâhoping to figure out some better way to do things. And I will even go out of my way to ask questionsâeven if it seems proddingâbecause I can sense thereâs an aha moment in there for us. And you know what, it has gotten easier with time.
8 Reasons to Network:
Having said all that, here are 8 reasons for introvertsâlike us!âto network (and ESPECIALLY D.I.Y. Rock Stars).
1. Understand that networking is just about finding more people like you
2. Itâs also about letting as many people as possible know what the fuck you do
3. You WONâT get ANY of the benefits of it UNLESS you start trying to do it.
4. It ISN'T an overnight process. It has taken stepping out here and TRYING some of these strategies for the past 4 years to REALLY feel the impact (and I know weâve ONLY scratched the surface).
5. Make a commitment to AT LEAST start implementing SOME of these strategies (below) and if in a year, you donât see any difference, I will eat my hat!
6. Be realistic. Needless to say that itâs MUCH easier to network with those who are less known than those whose names are constantly in the headlines. Start there. Or even more attainable to forge a relationship with are your peers. (It took me THIS long to realize that making friends with folks who are on a similar path to us gave us a ton of support and ideas and opened us up to THEIR people.)
7. This leads me to my next point: Once you meet a few people, you will AUTOMATICALLY connect yourself to THEIR people. Itâs like an INSTANT âgift.â In other words, this ONE person will vouch for you with their people, so that more doors will open that you didnât even have to knock on.
8. You donât need everybody! You only need people who TRULY vibe with what youâre doing, so DONâT approach everybody; only try these strategies with folks who you admire genuinelyâand NOT just because theyâre famous đâor because of a specific idea/message/method that they are sharing that you believe in. Those are the folks to put your time and effort into. Because you are an introvert means that you SHOULDNâT bother taking on getting too cozy to everybody; that kind of pursuit will only find you EXHAUSTED and ready to throw in the towel and thatâs not what we want for you. đ„°
7 Strategies for networking for introverts:
1. Start with a larger vision
Thatâs the ONLY way you can figure out ALL the steps after this. ( http://bit.ly/rockstarvision ).
2. Make a list.
Who are some of the folks that you WISH you had any kind of âfriendlyâ relationship with? (For us, it was our peers in this D.I.Y. Rock Star journey and some of those folks a little beyond us, who we thought had figured a few more things out.)
3. Just reach out.
You donât have anything to lose by reaching out. Hereâs my oldest trickâthat I started 4 years agoâwhen folks that I want to know better email meâoh, yeah! Get on their email list, if you can!â I email them back with a personal response to whatever theyâre talking about. I also ask at least one questionâso as to garner SOME type of responseâand then, at the bottom of the email, I include a kick- ass photo of us with one major link along with a list pertinent links at the bottom of the screen (see an example below). When I first tried it, I thought they wouldnât see it or wouldnât even care, but youâd be surprised at the number of folks who PERSONALLY respond to me, and even more, sometimes visit our links to find out more about us! Itâs been incredible to feel like I am making âfriendsâ with people I have looked up to for the last few years! Of course, it doesnât ALWAYS work, but it has worked MORE times than not, soâŠ..Youâre welcome! đđŸ
4. Donât mind if it doesnât work.
What I will say is that the MOST important part is that you are figuring out who you are and how you feel comfortable expressing yourself as you write these emails, so even when you DONâT get a response, you are practicing your craft as thatâs a good thing. Further, if you got a bad feeling about emailing this person and have decided that theyâre NOT a good fit for you, use these lack of responses as your cue to scratch them off your list. You DON'T need everybody (remember?); you only want to attract YOUR people.
5. Never seem needy.
As an introvert, one of the things that I hated about the idea of networking is appearing âneedy â and if youâre like us, you donât want to ask anyone for anything. What we are saying is donât ask! In fact, I have NEVER asked any of the people I have reached out to for ANYTHINGânot to be in their podcast, not to guest post on their blog, and not to come over and be a part of our various enterprises. I SIMPLY responded to whatever it is they are talking about, dropped a cool graphic at the bottom of the email and some relevant links. There is NO directive for them to go do ANYTHING. In fact, if they choose to check something out, it will be because it is their own choice and NOT because I have asked. I think about it like itâs making friends at a party; you wouldnât walk right up to someone and ask for something; you SIMPLY want to get to know them. âDonât get me wrong, though, invariably opportunities open up in their world that you are PERFECT for. And guess who they contact first? You got it! âBut NEVER ask! (In fact, they get asked SO much that it immediately turns them off when folks ask.)
6. Be a billboard for yourself.
Wear the merch that advertises what youâre doing. â-Bonus tip: Make sure your t-shirt has a front AND a back graphic, etc. â-By displaying what youâre into, you will give people who are drawn to that a REASON to approach YOU! â-Remember, theyâre LIKELY introverts too! â-So, give them an easy opening. (â--True story. At our first South By Southwest conference (http://bit.ly/sxswobservations ), a sitting person behind us at a session told us that he Googled us at the break, because the back of Bruceâs jacket had our logo prominently displayed!)